DEI is About Everyone, Not Some
In a world where diversity, equity, and inclusion (DEI) are central to discussions about fairness and opportunity, it’s easy to assume that only marginalised groups benefit.
However, DEI benefits everyone, including those who are often considered “privileged.” It’s not about taking opportunities away from certain groups, but about ensuring that everyone has the ability to thrive, regardless of background or identity.
Beyond the Surface of Privilege
When we discuss privilege, it’s important to look at it through the lens of intersectionality. While middle-aged, neurotypical white men are often categorised as privileged, this view overlooks the societal pressures and stereotypes they, too, face. In fact, even those who seem to have societal advantages can still carry heavy emotional and social burdens.
For example, while women face challenges in advancing their careers while raising young families, men also struggle with societal expectations about family and career balance.
Men are often expected to focus entirely on their careers—working long hours, traveling, and being constantly available—while sacrificing time with their children. In many countries, men are required to return to work shortly after the birth of a child, limiting their ability to bond with their new-borns or serve as positive male role models.
And just like anyone else, men face mental health challenges, but societal norms often discourage them from expressing vulnerability. The stigma that “boys don’t cry” contributes to high rates of depression, substance abuse, and tragically, suicide among men.
The truth is, these men—often seen as “privileged” due to their gender and status—also bear the weight of unrealistic societal expectations that can take a heavy toll on their well-being. Their struggles are real and deserve attention, just as the challenges faced by marginalised groups do.
The Changing Role of Men
For generations, men have been taught that their value lies in being the breadwinner, the protector, and the head of the family. They’ve been told that strength means suppressing emotion, that success is measured by how much they earn, and that their worth is tied to how well they can provide. These ideas are the core of toxic masculinity—not just harmful to others, but deeply limiting and damaging to men themselves.
Many men have fulfilled these roles dutifully, only to find themselves feeling empty and lost, living up to an identity that was handed to them rather than one they chose. In a world where emotional expression was often seen as weakness, countless men have been left disconnected from their true selves, their partners, and even their own children.
Now, as society shifts—as women and girls demand equity, respect, and independence—men are faced with a challenge, but also a profound opportunity: the chance to redefine who they are and who they want to be.
But change is hard. And for some, the erosion of these long-standing norms feels like a threat.
When your identity has been shaped around dominance, control, and being needed in a very specific way, it can be deeply unsettling to watch those expectations disappear.
Some men, instead of evolving, have responded with anger, resentment, or even misogyny—not because women have taken something away from them, but because they were never shown an alternative way to be whole.
About Love and Affection
The misguided belief that dominating women is necessary for love or affection is a product of that same toxic legacy. In truth, affection isn’t earned through control or power—it’s nurtured through emotional stability, presence, and authenticity. When men give themselves permission to be vulnerable, to be real, and to grow, they open the door to deeper, more meaningful relationships—not just with women, but with themselves.
This evolution isn’t about losing power—it’s about reclaiming selfhood. It’s about stepping away from imposed stereotypes and toward a fuller version of manhood that includes compassion, emotional intelligence, and mutual respect. In doing so, men also create space for women to do the same—to be their full selves, without shrinking to fit outdated expectations.
DEI is About Choice for Everyone
DEI initiatives are not about granting unearned privileges to some or stripping away opportunities from others. They are about giving everyone the opportunity to succeed based on their true merits, without being constrained by rigid societal norms and stereotypes.
Just as women deserve more opportunities to thrive without sacrificing their family life, men, too, should have the freedom to spend time with their families without the pressure to prioritise work above all else.
DEI gives everyone the tools to live more freely and fully—not by reversing roles or flipping hierarchies, but by dismantling them altogether, so each person has the freedom to define who they truly are. For men, this means shedding the burdens of traditional masculinity and embracing a more balanced, authentic, and emotionally rich version of life.
It’s about levelling the playing field—not giving some an unfair advantage, but ensuring that everyone, regardless of background or identity, has the choice and the opportunity to walk their own path.
When we remove the constraints of privilege and bias for all individuals, we create a world where everyone can thrive, not just survive—where authenticity is valued, and where inclusion lifts us all.
💬I’d love to hear your thoughts on how DEI impacts everyone, including the pressures that men face to conform to stereotypes. Share your perspective in the comments below!
✨And if you’re interested in diving deeper into this topic, don’t miss last week’s episode of Intersecting Voices, where I had an insightful conversation with Mark Freed, co-founder of Men for Inclusion. We discussed why DEI is crucial for all, and how men, too, carry the weight of societal expectations that limit their ability to live authentically.✨
Tune in to hear more about how we can create a world where everyone, regardless of gender, can thrive and be true to themselves.




Leave a comment